When I accomplish a goal, I wish I had a button to push. It would play a recording of one of those European soccer announcers celebrating the ball making it in the net. I don’t speak Spanish or Italian, but their passion for the game is contagious. I’m going to start my next writing day by finding a clip of of that drawn out, Goooooooooalllll! It’s fabulous.

At this point in the year, I’m still pretty pumped about my hopes, dreams and resolutions. Everything is still possible and I don’t hear that giant egg timer in my head ticking away the days and weeks quite so loudly.

My writing goals are going quite well. And it’s about time. I have enlisted as many pressures as I can tolerate to push me to finish my memoir, The Second. Yep, I named the book. This is a big deal for me as I’ve changed it at least six times. I’m sticking with this one.

I heard about a very successful life coach, speaker and author (Mel Robbins) who admitted she rewrote one of her best-selling books twice. I was like, what? Try seven or eight times on this God forsaken tome. The difference is, her book sold very well and mine is in my computer. It’s the perfection trap and a lot of other excuses that have held me back. But no more! I’ve promised myself, my kids and my therapist (and now you) I’m done as of March 1, 2020. No more editing, tweaking, fixing or supposed improvements.

It started out years ago as The Great American Novel. What a ridiculous quest that was. In trying to be everything to everyone, I lost sight of my North Star; my voice as a writer. The inner critic ran roughshod over my drafts, grinding her heel on the pages and laughing as she reminded me, “You’ll never finish.”

When I switched to memoir, I thought I was going to complete it quickly. Oh, the angsty crap I generated in that endeavor. I have nixed ninety percent of the scenes I thought I needed and it now has a central theme: faith. That’s it. Not the life and times of every good and bad thing that ever happened to me. That’s not memoir. It’s just a mess.

I’m eager to have you read it. It will not be perfect but that should never have been the goal. I’m shooting for good enough.

~ Colleen

Published by theoriginalcbd

Aspiring memoirist, humorist and actual mom.

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